The Standard of Love, Part 1

Posted by April Butler on

Welcome to Real Talk with Reltuh! I am Aprile Reltuh, the Owner of Reltuh's Culture Corner, here to have a heart to heart moment with you. I would like to shed light on the topic of love, and offer a chance to re-evaluate our perception of the act of love.

In life, we often find ourselves in situations that cause us pain, whether physically, mentally, or emotionally. Even the small things hurt, if not worse. Most "big" things are seen coming, but it's the small things that hurt most, because what might seemed to have been small and insignificant, can have a massive impact. 

Have you ever stepped on a pushpin, barefoot? 
Accidentally stepping on a pushpin is painful, especially if the needle is facing up. Although the pushpin is small, if stepped on, it can puncture your foot, causing bleeding, and possibly leaving your foot sore. The affects of stepping on a pushpin may last well after the action has taken place.The pushpin is small, but if used improperly can leave you hurt and wounded for an extended amount of time. This is why it is vital to watch how we are treating one another. What may seem small to us, can also be harmful to others, and sometimes harmful to ourselves as well. Some actions that we consider "small" can unfortunately cause long lasting harm to our loved ones, and valuable relationships.
There is a saying that says, "Do unto others, as you would have them do unto you." Although this is a nice and valuable statement, it does not address the fact that the standard of love you allow for yourself will not always match the standard of love that others are willing to receive from you. With this being said, your standard of love for yourself may not justify the love you give others, beneath their standard of love, for themselves. In simple terms, just because you'd allow any form treatment from others, does not mean others should allow any form treatment from you.
Now is the time for self-examination. Whether you were hurt, or you were the one who caused harm, it is always best to re-evaluate yourself when conflict arises with others. Every side is valid. Your side is not more important than the other. In any relationship, your job is to love and be willing to understand and learn. Love others how they need to be loved, not how you decide they should be.
Thank you for reading!
I hope you enjoyed, and return for more Real Talk with Reltuh!
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